Episode 4- No Fun

Jamie’s Ministry of Food was a massive success in Rotherham.

 

 

 

Such a spectacular success that the whole nation is ready to follow our lead and join the movement.

 

 

I know this, because TV told me.

 

 

Forget all the stat’s, the evidence, the government reports, the science, everything you have ever experienced in real life:

 

 

Pass it On is the only way we can effectively tackle obesity.

 

 

 

In fact, forget all that, because even when months have been edited into four hours- it has been impossible to show the campaign working.

 

 

 

Forget all that- TV told me how to judge if Ministry of Food has been a success. If he could get a few people to come to a party with free admission and free food on a nice Summers day- that would prove Pass it On was a winner.

 

 

 

Before the final acid test- we were given clear signs that the tide was turning. Bramall, a huge building firm used to handling multi million pound contracts, bought a hob for their staff room. Firm proof- and there’s more..

 

“Meanwhile a new company, 2010, with 640 employees has decided to come on board”.

 

 

 

Impressive- unless you know that 2010 are an ALMO, wholly owned and controlled by Rotherham Borough Council to look after their housing stock. So the council, who by this time are up to their necks in the failing scheme, prop it up yet again.

 

 

 

The All Saints Square HQ was buzzing too. 30 volunteers. Now that is impressive. Anyone with experience of volunteering will know how hard it is to get people involved. It must be a pretty inspirational gig that can pull 30 unpaid foot soldiers so quickly. This impression was slightly spoiled by them being shown not to know the basic idea behind the scheme. It looked like they’d signed up for “get to meet Jamie Oliver”. If the scheme is rolled out to other areas without the meet the celeb option- recruitment may well be problematic.

 

 

 

Forget the negativity though. We are told that the HQ has become a cauldron of activity and that it’s getting busier and busier every day. The word unbelievable is thrown about a lot. I can confirm that the impression given is not to be believed.

 

 

 

Forget that- get on board. All down to Herringthorpe for the big party. Free food, free entry, free stuff for the kids to do on a Saturday afternoon and, most importantly, an appearance by celebrity chef Jamie Oliver.

 

 

 

In my experience: if you want to show a big crowd- you shoot it from a distance in a wide shot. If you want to make a smallish crowd look bigger- you keep everything nice and tight so the screen is always full. Even when he took his little crew up on the slope- the camera kept tight on them to block out the wide open spaces behind.

 

 

Strangely, I got a warm feeling at the end of the show. It was inevitable that Rotherham Borough Council would pony up. To be honest- we were lucky to get off with a quarter of a million (for now). The warmth came from a strong sense of solidarity I felt with the people of Hull and Bradford. We are not alone. They too seem to be ruled by the same type of celeb worshipping drones. A burger on the playing fields and a photo opp’ with Jamie and they couldn’t wait to empty the public purse at his feet.

 

 

None of the neighbouring boroughs showed. If it was such a huge hit in Rotherham- surely an obesity hotspot like Barnsley would be eager to sign on the dotted line. Maybe they have got bogged down with all that boring listening to experts and coming up with a coherent strategy that some nerd politicians do. Them with their booming town centre and Digital Media Centre. What a bunch of squares. They should get down with Dolly and Jamie like our kool kats.

 

 

Or maybe they’ve seen what’s really been happening in Rotherham and steered clear.

 

 

So, that’s at least £250,000 worth of public money and counting. How much has Jamie’s Ministry of Food Ltd kicked in?

How much of the spin off book money is going into the “movement”?

Have a guess.

 

 

 

The damage to the image of the town may cost us even more in the long run. New descriptions in the press this week were “fat town Rotherham” and “Roly Poly” Rotherham.

 

The national spotlight does not shine on our town very often.

 

 

Mud sticks.

 

 

Kebabs for kids, cheesy chips, men who have never cooked in thirty years, hoists for 55 stone patients: to the ABC1 target audience,this is Rotherham without Jamie.

 

 

 

This was not an accident.

 

 

 

The final piece of voice over , delivered by Timothy Spall:

 

“…thousands of new cooks, who had never boiled an egg are making meals for their families and loving it.”

 

 

How did our poor simple town ever manage before he came?

 

 

Jamie will move on now. His next project is looking after the welfare of pigs. No scope for gags about Rotherham there then. He’ll only come back here to slag us off if the council stop funding his folly.

 

 

 

 

Of course he’ll continue to advertise a company that is one of the major suppliers of the fizzy drinks and ready meals he denounces. An organisation that encourages car use and chokes the life out of independent grocers.

 

 

 

So, public money earmarked to tackle obesity in Rotherham goes into a useless cooking scheme designed to promote Jamie Oliver.

 

 

 

Supermarkets such as Sainsburys are prime suspects when it comes to pushing products and lifestyle choices which are related to obesity, but he still happily promotes them and lines his pockets. 

 

  

 

Ever feel like you’ve been cheated?